Is it hot in here or it is just me?

So yesterday at work I was so hot and my legs were sweating so much (I had a long skirt on), I briefly wondered if my water broke b/c I felt a trickle of sweat running down my knee. Summer in Texas is ridiculous.
I now have a fan on my desk and under it.

Laughing my ass off....

So Vegas-SIL sent me a funny email which I just had to post....Husband makes me LAUGH! She was apparently chatting with him about my latest blog entry titled The Human Body. I started laughing so hard, yogurt almost came out my nose.

Husband: not on me that's gross

SIL: fyi (and this is probably more info than you want) but......after baby comes, when you guys are getting frisky with each other, she's gonna start squirting milk

Husband: ya. that's not too much, that's WAY too much

SIL: hahaha

The Human Body

So I've always known that the human body is really amazing but this fact was solidified in my mind after attending part 2 of our childbirth class. There's a lot of stuff that goes on during the whole birthing processes! One major take-away that I have after seeing a few videos is that if I give birth through the vag, I DO NOT WANT A MIRROR and Husband will be up by my face, not petting the baby's head or whatever some people do! Fortunately, he did not start gagging like he did in the breastfeeding class when they showed a pics of the diaper from day one to day five but we both wanted to look away from the train wreck that was natural (and when I say natural, I do mean no drugs) childbirth. I completely respect anyone for going through that with no drugs but that's not for me...the moment I walk in the hospital, I'm going to start looking for the anesthesiologist to hook me up! Another moment of awe came this morning when I was getting my snuggle on with Husband. We kept on hearing about the importance of skin-to-skin with the new baby and how it makes your milk come in sooner, soothes baby, etc. but I didn't realize that it can also make you start leaking colostrum before baby even comes. That might have been a nice tidbit to know. As I was laying there, I felt something kind of wet on my arm and pulled away from Husband. Sure enough, a little colostrum had leaked out. My exact wording was "Don't freak out but some colostrum just leaked out and you might have a tiny bit on your back." Being the sensitive guy, Husband responded "You mean I have titty milk on me, gross!". Haha...as I've mentioned before, life is never boring in our house!
We also got the proofs back for our maternity pictures. I'll post some when we get the disk. My face looks extremely "full" in some (side note: Why do people think that saying your face is full is any better than fat?? It's the exact same thing!) but I absolutely love them. You can see one on Laurie's website (galleries - portraits) that's black and white that's one of my favorites. Husband was actually whispering "I have to fart" in my ear which is why I was laughing so hard but it (surprisingly) turned out great! www.laurieherreraphoto.com

Texas-sized Stupidity

Where to begin. For my birthday, Husband and I decided to go see George Strait at the new Cowboys Stadium. Can you say Holy Cow?! That stadium is ginormous (but beautiful)! We decided to leave our house around 1:15ish b/c the parking lots opened at 2:00 and we wanted to beat some of the traffic. On the way, we saw a topless bar sign that said "We now have all pretty girls". No shit. That sign kind of made me want to go in just to make sure but I'm not sure they were open that early. After driving about an hour and half (seriously), we arrived at Lot 11 where we had some friends tailgating. We pulled up to the "attendant" and asked how much it was to park but were told that we had to have a pass. Husband, being the brain child he is, went directly straight and parked even though we were specifically told to do a u-turn and leave the lot. As expected, a parking lot attendant promptly found our car and instructed us to leave as first directed. We drove across the street (one place was actually asking for $60 to park...are you shitting me? $60 to fu*&ing park?) and found a place for a reasonable $30.00. (I'm still in shock that it was actually $30 for a parking spot but I got over it after seeing how far away other parking was.) When we got to the tailgate spot, I had the misfortune to meet Debbie Downer. She has a 15 month old who she just had to show me a picture of after learning that I was pregnant. WTF? Just b/c I'm having a kid doesn't mean I want to see yours. She also told me about how her baby didn't take to her nipple for a month, that she hadn't lost her belly from the baby (kid is 15 months old) and that her labor was horrible. I also learned in the first 5 minutes that her baby daddy is no longer in the picture and is not involved in the kids life and that child support has been a big issue. WHY WOULD YOU TELL THIS TO A COMPLETE STRANGER?! We decided to go in the stadium about 4:30 b/c I was starting to burn and wanted to get into the AC (so glad it wasn't outdoor only venue). We got in line to get some food and I'm not kidding when I say we saw a lady dipping. A LADY! We finally got our food and settled in to our seats which were on the second level, row 7. Thankfully our seats were 1 and 2 so I could easily get up to pee (which I did at least 8 times in the 5 hours we were there). Husband was in the second seat and had the fortune of sitting next to Waving Willie. This guy and his girl (I think they were together but I swear they didn't talk the ENTIRE time they sat there...strange) sat down and there was a beer sitting in the guy's drink holder so he naturally asked if it was Husband's. After being told it was not ours, I'm not kidding here, he took a swig. WHY WOULD YOU DRINK A WARM BEER THAT WAS SITTING THERE WHEN YOU SAT DOWN?!?!?! I promptly looked away so that Husband did not catch my eye and waited until what I thought was an appropriate time and asked if that really happened. Throughout the concert, this guy kept waving at the singer (Lee Ann Womak, Blake Shelton, Reba and King George). We're at least 500 ft away from the stage so there was absolutely NO way anyone could see us way up there. At one point, I think he thought maybe the big screen was the actual singer, not sure though. We also got to see Elvis reincarnated in the form of an older broad who had blue flame sequins all over her jeans and a guy who was signing EVERY word to Reba's "Fancy". Good times!

Adventures in Babysitting

For this blog, I have to give a special Shout-Out to Husband as he's the focus of this story which I thought everyone would get a kick out of. Keep in mind that I'm due exactly 7 weeks from today.
Vegas SIL was in town last week and brought our sweet, teething (ie. drooling) nephew along for the ride so Husband was tasked with watching Nephew while we went to my first baby shower. Quick facts: Shower was from 10:30 to 12:30 - Nephew was dropped off in a onesie, fed with a clean diaper around 10:00 with plans to pick up after the shower was over - Husband had cereal/peas on-hand in the event that Nephew got hungry and toys were provided. During the shower, SIL got a call from Husband asking where the paci was as Nephew was starting to cry & he couldn't find Nephew's "normal" one...we navigated him to Uno's room to get the spare paci that was a freebie from Babies R Us when I registered and if that couldn't be found, to give the kid a nipple from a bottle. Around 12:15, SIL got another call and had to leave as Husband could not get Nephew to calm down. When I got home, here is the recap I got from Husband.
- Nephew arrived at 10:00 and was happy until about 10:45ish when he started crying
- Husband walked with him, tried to soothe and put down in his pack n play when he first started to cry
- Husband waited approximately 30 seconds after putting Nephew in the pack n play to go back in and pick him up b/c he was still crying
- Husband thought that Nephew might have a dirty diaper and if he changed him the crying would stop. Here the story gets funny. Husband did not realize that the onesie Nephew came in had snaps on the crotch so when he went to check his diaper, he had to unsnap the shoulder buttons and shimmy the onesie down Nephew. This only resulted in louder crying and a frustrated Husband as the diaper was not dirty. Needless to say, the onesie stayed off.
- Husband's last resort was to try and feed Nephew. If anyone has ever tried this with a crying baby, you know it's not the easiest task. Every time Nephew would open his mouth loud to cry, Husband would shove a spoonful of baby food in his mouth. The result was 1/2 the food never making it past Nephew's face and the other 1/2 coming out as the crying continued.
By the time SIL arrived, she was handed an almost naked baby with food all over his face and body. Poor Husband was so frazzled, he asked that SIL be considerate the next time she left her baby and make sure he had an easier outfit to change on. Both SIL and MIL were on the floor rolling when he explained how he took off the onesie.
Can't wait to have a baby with this man! Things will always be funny in our house!!!